“May you never be too grown up to search the skies on Christmas Eve.” —Unknown

(Warning: Santa Claus spoiler alert)

Many of my early childhood memories are now cloudy and faint, as if lingering in some kind of ethereal, dream-like world, partially hidden in a shroud of mist and mystery.

But there are a handful of events that I can still see so clearly, so vividly, that it’s almost as if I could reach out and touch them.

And like every Christmas Eve, we had to go to bed extra early. After all, we couldn’t risk Santa Claus passing over our house because we hadn’t been in bed when he tried to deliver our presents! So after setting out milk and cookies to give Santa some much-needed energy, and writing a note of greetings, my younger brother Leo and I, each clad in our new Christmas pajamas, scampered off to bed, he to the bottom bunk, and I to the top.

We could hardly contain our excitement. How long would it be until Santa arrived? What special surprise would he have in his bag? What if our parents forgot to leave the door unlocked? (We didn’t have a chimney, so it was Santa’s only option).

As I lay there, I wondered what it must be like for Santa and the elves, working so hard all year long at the North Pole, preparing for this one, big night.

“They must be as excited as we are!” I thought.

“No,” I thought, “I must be seeing things.”

But after rubbing my eyes and looking again, I realized that my eyes were not, in fact, deceiving me. There, off in the distance, I saw it as clear as day—the blinking of Rudolph’s red nose, as he and Santa delivered presents.

“Wow!” I thought, “what lucky kid has Santa at their house already?” I figured that Santa’s sleigh must be on the rooftop, with Rudolph and the team waiting patiently for his return.

With Santa being so close, I knew I had to get to sleep, and fast. But I was so awestruck, so excited, that I couldn’t stop watching Rudolph’s blinking nose. I mean, how fortunate could I be, seeing Santa and Rudolph in action? It wasn’t easy to just close your eyes and ignore such a rare sighting.

So I decided that as soon as Rudolph led the sleigh away, I would close my eyes. But, after some time had passed and Rudolph still hadn’t moved, I started to get a little worried. Was something wrong? Santa sure was taking a long time at one house. How would he make it around the world if he spent so much time at one place?

Then, I realized, “Maybe Santa is waiting for me to go to sleep so he can come to our house!”

Reluctantly, I closed my eyes. I knew I had to do the right thing and go to sleep before Santa could visit. Still, I couldn’t help peeking a few more times. But sure enough, Rudolph still hadn’t moved. I knew they were waiting for me to fall asleep, and thankfully, sleep finally came.

The next morning, before the sun was even up, Leo and I, full of anticipation, ran into the living room. And we weren’t disappointed! There, under the soft glow of the blue lights on the Christmas tree, lay colorfully wrapped presents in a plethora of shapes and sizes.

My brother and I went to the table, and as we’d hoped, Santa had eaten most of the cookies and milk we’d left for him. To our joy, we saw that he’d even written something on our note!

“Ho, Ho, Ho!” the note read, in scribbled writing. “Santa must have been in a hurry” I thought, “or maybe he needs handwriting classes.” But no, of course he was in a hurry—it only made sense that he would be.

When I told my family about what I’d seen the night before, they shared in my enthusiasm and excitement, asking questions about my amazing experience.

As I listened to a couple of kids talking about it in the next seat over, I could hardly believe my ears. I still remember the disappointment I felt as it dawned on me that maybe all the magic that I so deeply, so surely, so wholeheartedly believed in, might not really exist after all. At first, I wasn’t sure if I should be upset with the kids for telling lies, or upset with myself for doubting that Santa existed. My mind simply couldn’t accept it.

Yes, I knew there were other Santas. I mean, we had our picture taken with them every year, but we knew they were just Santa’s helpers. The real Santa Claus lived at the North Pole and was busy preparing for Christmas, so of course he needed helpers.

I also realize that the reason for celebrating Christmas—the birth of Jesus—sometimes gets lost in the commercialization and overspending that now takes place. But I believe that, in its best state, the spirit of Santa, that magic, helps remind us of the good things in mankind, things that upright religions also promote, things such as selflessness, thinking of others first, sharing and giving to others, love, warmth and caring, joy and happiness, gratitude, peace and goodwill toward others, and having a deep sense of belief and faith.

While Christmas could undoubtedly use some rebalancing, maybe the reason communities are transformed into something wondrous and magical, that we have a sense of hope and possibility, and that our mood is elevated this time of year, is that we focus more on these good things—thinking of others first, being kind, and performing acts of giving and charity.

Whatever a parent chooses to teach their child about Santa, in my view, the important thing is to keep alive a sense of magic, of possibility, of faith—and of course the reason for celebrating Christmas, the birth of Jesus, and all that that implies. For those who are religious or spiritual, this theme of faith and a belief in a sort of magic carries over into a belief in the Creator, a higher being that we can’t directly see, but that we can see evidence of.

As the conductor in “The Polar Express” said, “Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can’t see.” Just because someone can’t believe something, doesn’t mean it isn’t true. At the end of the day, faith is an act of trust.

For a young child, belief in things such as magic and the unseen comes naturally. They have no skepticism, no cynicism, and none of the ideas that we adults have formed about how the world works and how things should be. Perhaps if we can reconnect with that place that exists in all of us, that place where Santa Claus is possible, we can broaden our hearts and minds.

Maybe by bringing a little magic into our lives, having faith in humanity and in something greater than ourselves, and helping one another by giving of ourselves unconditionally, we can carry the magic and spirit of Christmas with us every day, and help make the world a better place.